Nar Shaddaa

The togruta was sitting in a private booth, knees held tight. While she kept staring at the drink she had ordered, any who could see it would notice they were both empty.

She lowered her head further retreating inside her mind.

Moyr answered the call. She slipped into the room without making noise and removed the mask only when they were alone. She sat baside the Togruta and put a hand over her hand.

The togruta did not look up. Her eyes were moving, certainly, but they seemed to move in erratic patterns. The only other trace of movement was that of her short and forced breathing.

OOC: Flipping Empire Destiny here.Carry on.

"...You know I don't see anger as a bad thing, do you?" Moyr broke the silence.

Baesal opened her mouth as if to speak but only a dry rasp came. A following movement of the throat indicated a clear effort to produce the saliva required to reply

''...I am not angry...it would be easier if I was''

"Disappointed then? Lost?" Moyr continued softly, leaning into the seat "But if I am a part of the problem, or a part of the solution, you'd have to tell me at some point."

She finally looked up, but not at Moyr, not really. Her eyes were unfocused

''You knew about the Mandalorians''

That did not seem to be an accusation, a question or a reproach. It seemed more like a laborous statement then anything

"I tried to orchestrate the involvement of the Mandalorians, but it got awry. I had hoped Corso Fett would take charge and deny access to it to the Republic." Moyr replied without flinching. "But there was too little time and the confluence of Jedi, SIS and other interests were hard to manage, so in the end what was deployed were rogue elements that didn't do what I wanted them to do."

She thinned her lips

''You knew before I told you about it?''

"That something was afoot because the Imperial side was shut off? I got a tip and suspected a few things, and I told you about it. Some details you chose to spare me I learned after our meeting. I was operating on a very short notice." Moyr didn't feel like lying.

She was silent

''And what did you hope to achieve?''

"To let the research data be captured by a party least likely to use it, Mandalore." Moyr said insistently. "You seem to be forgetting I hold no illusions about the moral qualifications of the order you are part of and seem to be increasingly ensnared by, nor of the ruthless Republican secret services involved in that operation. Which proved that they were happy to kill for getting exclusive on Czerka research just fine. Of all the options I was left with because you had been cool with working with your new friends rather than the old ones on this, my faith in Mandalorian honour looked like the best bet."

She paused.

"You seem to be forgetting that making rakghouls is a practice out of the Sith repertoire. And yet they have not been widely used in this war."

Now she looked at her and her eyes held no emotion: they were cold colored cameras taking in the light and the shapes requiered to form a picture.

''Your calculations failed. They were based on erroneous data.'' the voice was almost alien, mechanical in intonation ''Your pawns sought to destroy us the moment they realised we wanted to destroy the research. Their action caused great damage. That the rakghouls were the product of sith sorcery is of no significant importance aside from showing that the Sith would be most likely to use the experiment.''

Not one muscle moved but her jaw

''And, of course, I am to blame. I am not allowed to have new contacts. All endavors most me run by you first so that they do not conflict with your own agenda. A tool becomes less useful if they choose to act on their own.''

"Is it the real message you want to give me, or you just need to take it out on me in some way?" Moyr studied the change of expression intently, and she abhorred what she saw. "I committed to a course of action I deemed right in response to your commitment to the course of action you deemed right. I will never be idle just because you choose not to involve me, and I think it works both ways. It's the risk you take when you're not coordinating things with me. What I would not entertain now is escalating a blame game. I obviously care not for your Jedi associates any more than you care about my Sith ones, but this should be of no surprise to you." Moyr was speaking calmly, though some perplexity and disappointment crept in. "To me, so far you've been the only redeeming quality of the rotten quagmire that is the Republic. But if you feel like a tool, you may well be, though definitely not mine. You'll see what will become of the research you've secured once your 'good regime' spawns another Karness Muur or a streak of genocidal maniacs."

Her eyes twitched, her breathing lost rythm for the first time she was not soundning robotic ''I don't know. I just feel like something broke in me.''

She just looked down once more

''There is no more research''

"This is what you wish to believe at the moment, Baes, because for you it's the right thing to believe in. But of all people you should be well aware that the most you've accomplished is imposing a setback. Those who were on the expedition with you will have their own designs what to do with the awareness they have acquired. Atrocious ideas never die."

She sighed, squeezing Baes' hand.

"If I were to be ironic I'd say welcome to the world of the broken, but I know this is not what you need right now."

She comforted her by a gentle stroke on the other woman's lekku.

She looked back at her, in those golden orbs that were her eyes, lekku unresponsive.

''No, they will not. I know that there is genuinely good people in the world.''

She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath

''You don't trust me...The faith I have in you is not shared.''

"To believe in you is one thing. To trust that you will do the right thing is another. I will always have my own thoughts on matters that do not relate to your intimate path through the Force. Any kind of leveraging to make me believe that advancing a Jedi or Republican agenda is something I should endorse will always fail, dear. Especially that you award me no symmetric courtesy. Your people are not good people to me any more than my people are good people to you." She sighed. "The more I listen to you the more I think that you cannot defend yourself well against the creeping corrupting hypocrisy of the Jedi. You may be failing in walking the fine line, Baes. You are beginning to like the self-righteousness your Order lures people with. Being the good guy, the shining beacon in the dark galaxy that can do no wrong, mete out no evil. It can see how tempting it can be, making all questionable thing unquestionable just because your side has the right of it."

''The world is far more complex then what you explain it to be.'' she said, he tone more even

''Your knowledge of the Jedi is tained by ignorance and the Sith's propaganda. The Jedi were the best choice at handling the victims of the experiments. They will find ways to reverse the procedd or they will give them a life other then that of a weapon.''

"In the end it's my belief against yours, Baes. You've always known my thoughts on believing in 'good regimes'. It's the order you hail that spawned the Sith you deplore. And it will continue to do so, because it's repressive, hypocritical strictures are an abuse of human condition. The only way you could save any of those children is to make them your own responsibility. Giving them away just helps you feel better." Moyr turned her face away. "I am ignorant. And emotional. And passionate. I embrace chaos and death as pillars of existence. I am everything your fellow Jedi want undone." She whispered bitterly, with pauses as she swallowed air in jolts. "I have never lied to you about this, but it looks like the realisation is dawning on you just now. So where does it leave us?"

''Emotion is a part of life...but ignorance is a choice. I went back to see the Black Witches, the same you wanted dead. It happens that they have been fighting the same fight as you but for longer. They fight against the Hutts and give hope and sanctuary to the people of Nal Hutta.''

She was silent

''You are more complex then a simple Jedi antithesis.'' This time she was the one closing the hand ''The moment you told me that you felt alone...I knew I had failed you.''

She slumped a little, sadness apparent

''At least now you have your true sister...she'll be better then the false one.''

"In some ways you did. In others you did not. There are no perfect people and Aphr is no different. She will give me hope in some things and grief in others. My loneliness is an issue deeper than either of you. But regardless of all the divergences and mishaps, my heart about you hasn't budged." Moyr said quietly, her voice faltering a bit. "But I see how I am more and more inconvenient to you on your path because of the choices I make and I'll continue to make. So if you choose to walk away now I won't hold you back. Like I didn't on Yavin."

She could not help but smirk

''Then by extension...you are not perfect either: you give me hope in some things and grief in others.''

She got silent for a moment

''I will not walk away, not this time...but I will also not give you a free pass on bad ideas Moyr. We will make mistakes...lets learn from them''

"You'll have to elaborate more. I don't know what you mean by this." Moyr smiled with some caution after taking several breaths, her glazed gaze returning to the Togruta.